Skip to main content

A Farewell

Dear Tissue Expanders,

Tonight is our last night together.  I'm breaking up with you.

It's been real, these last three and a half months.  Really, real.  So real that you have been on my mind for every single waking moment, as well as countless non-waking ones.  Although our time has drawn to a close and you will be carelessly discarded in the morning for a pair of more demure implants, I wanted to take this opportunity to tell you how I feel:  it's not me, it's you.

I thought I knew what I was getting into, choosing to go the tissue-expanders-to-implants route.  I heard that there was pain and discomfort with each subsequent fill, but I had no idea that you would become such a constant, pervasive force.  You have dominated most of my thoracic sensory nerve activity since Valentine's day.  You are all I feel.  Even now, after all this time, you're still the dominant presence.  I still feel like I'm wrapped tightly, and I give you most of that credit.  You have robbed me of hugs and sleep, two of the things I have needed the most over this span of time, and that has really kind of pissed me off.

I signed a document recently, giving my legal permission for the surgical facility to dispose of you in a "proper manner," but I have lustily dreamed of having an "Office Space" or "Goodfellas" moment with you.

Well, I have tried to keep this letter relatively civil, but I have run out of things to say.  I wish you the very best, but only until around 7:30 tomorrow morning.  After that, you're on your own.

XO,
Whit

Comments

  1. AnonymousMay 28, 2014 at 7:22 AM

    Love it!!!! So happy to hear that the next time I run into you I can give you a big ole hug!

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownMay 28, 2014 at 12:04 PM

    What happened to a bon fire farewell??? So glad you are down to the final phase. Love you, girl

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Fall, 2020

 And just like that, six years have come and gone. The years have seemed typical, I suppose, with laughter and love and friends and family.  We have watched our son grow (and grow and grow) into an incredible young teenager.  I have felt strong(ish), healthy, and whole.  I have worked with countless patients, volunteered excessively, and lived life, always trying to be the best wife, mom, and friend. I have also been uncomfortable.  I have felt, for the last six years, like my chest has been wrapped in the tightest industrial cellophane or tape you could imagine.  I have been unable to do even one pushup.  I have been unable to regain my shoulder flexion (overhead) strength, and I even tore my acellular dermal matrix (ADM or mesh) in a Pilates class.  I have been unable to lie on my stomach.  I have lost countless hours of sleep.   I have been unable to receive any MRI imaging to check for implant integrity, which was recommended wh...
2 comments
Read more

Hospital Checklist

I hope you don't find this blog too wordy...  I am chronically verbose.  If I can dispel fear or panic by any degree for even one person, then I will consider myself successful. Unfortunately, I have several friends who have had similar surgeries.  Some less major, some much more complex.  I picked their brains so thoroughly before my surgery, I swear it fortified my strength and confidence. Should you or someone you know find themselves in a similar boat, I can tell you that I was prepared.  Feel free to extract any amount of information from my list.  I'm here to share. This is what you will need for the hospital : Cute and comfortable pajamas that button up the front. A few more big button up shirts TWO fanny packs.  These are for your drains.  One to use, and a spare for when it gets wet/dirty/washed. Lip Moisturizer (Vasaline Lip Therapy is the best.)  You will want this as soon as you wake up. Phone/ipad charger (Extra long...
Post a Comment
Read more

Now Even Softer

I am an educator.  If not by trade (which I am sometimes), then by personality.  I have always taken the time to explain things to people, the why .  I suppose that is the reason for this (rambling?) blog. It started when I was in kindergarten.  I don't have a vivid memory of this actually taking place, but I have been informed that my mother received a call from my teacher, asking her to have a conversation with me about why I don't need to teach the other children in the class how to read.  In first grade, I was given a reading group to lead.  In high school, I tutored other students in chemistry.  College students.  (Thanks, Mr. Worley.) I had to educated myself extensively on the subject of breast cancer, from the perspective of a patient.  Although I am not qualified to speak at a pathology symposium regarding cribriform vs. micropapillary growth patterns of ductal carcinoma, I can certainly hold my own in almost any other setting ab...
Post a Comment
Read more